If someone were to ask me who I was last year I would have said, "runner, wife, accountant, step mom, and doggy mama". Now I can happily add cyclist to that list of "who I am" confidently! I am a cyclist!
What makes you define yourself as something? In my opinion, it's the things you love, the things you work hard at and find pride in. It's the things that require effort but give you a sense of achievement and pride. It's the things that make you excited about life! So being able to add to these definitions only makes life more and more exciting and gives you more options for finding joy in any given day. Don't restrict yourself to who you've been! Finding new definitions of you can enrich your life.
I dabbled in ABA racing last year. I had some success with it but still thought of it as my cross training for running. And it was. But with a forced break from running it allowed me to overcome my fear of swimming (no I'm still not a "swimmer") and discover xcountry skiing (I will be a skier) and become a cyclist!
I had four goals for my race season. These goals may not make sense to all of you but they were: 1) increase my FTP by at least 5% (I ended up increasing it by 12.5%!!) 2) upgrade to cat three, 3) top three in a crit, and 4) defend my RMCC hill climb win from last year. I can happily say I obtained all four goals plus some I added along the way. But it did more than help me check off a list - it gave me confidence that, hey, I can set goals and I can achieve them! One of these, in particular, I'd like to speak to.
My husband and I had decided in February to do the Axel Merckx Gran Fondo in Penticton that took place on July 10, 2016. My husband was going to race it and I thought I'd come for moral support and a good long bike ride (that's what gran fondo means after all) with one little goal - give it my all on the Summerland KOM hill. That is a little race within the fondo that essentially times every rider up this 8%+ climb. The fastest riders up the hill in each age block of ten years gets a prize - the coveted polka dot jersey that represents the king (or Queen) of the mountain. My main motivation: I've always liked polka dots...
I am a good climber. My power to weight ratio works in my favour for this very thing and I thought I had a chance at top three. Usually I don't have this kind of confidence. I was liking this. I brushed off this newfound confidence until during breakfast before the race I announce to five perfect strangers, at the B&B we were staying at, that I was going for the Summerland QOM. All of a sudden I realize what came out of my mouth, embarrassed, but kinda proud of myself for actually thinking I might be able to do it. Otherwise why would I announce to perfect strangers that I'd have to see later that day again that I was going for something I could fail at?
In all reality, no one there would have cared. They were all there to put in a long ride and give them guilt free consciences for the okanagan wine they were going to consume post ride (part of my motivation also - who am I kidding)! I came up to that hill like a bat outa hell passing people on my left and right. I felt good about my effort and then had another 95km to ride until I'd know how I'd done.
Well I ended up second women overall by 0:01 and first in my age category. Since first place was a former Olympian I felt quite privileged to come in behind her! Results show that I was 9th person over the finish line for the velofondo and first girl. I rode my bike back to the hotel in my pretty polka dots and a smile from one end of okanagan lake to the other!
We got invited to dinner that night with the fellow fondo-ers at our B&B and when they asked how it went I proudly told them I'd gotten the jersey! One lady's jaw almost dropped and she said, "OMG! When I heard you say that this morning I thought, oh you're so cute thinking you can get that jersey!" We all had a good laugh and it made me realize - if we don't believe in ourselves no one else will! If you work hard at something, you better believe in yourself doing what you set out to do because, quite frankly, no one else will until you prove it to them with a polka dot jersey, or whatever tangible thing you can present to them. No one else knows the hard work we put into the things we love and work towards. The reality of it is - I don't need this jersey to prove to myself that I am a cyclist. There were thousands of other cyclists out there with me on July 10th doing what they love and working hard at it.
This season has seen many other successes. Even as a runner on sabbatical I was able to achieve a Guinness World Record with the help of 11 beautiful ladies. I finished first at the GWN Duathlon qualifying me for age-group worlds next year (along with my hubby - so proud!!!!) and many ABA successes. It's been an amazing couple of months but I am ready to focus on these other definitions of myself for a few months, maybe more. And even then, I will still be a cyclist, and a runner, and whatever else I want to become that is within my power!
Life is short. Seek out things you love! Give them your all, and never fear unbecoming someone you have already proven to yourself that you are!
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